I've gotten so used to your pushing me away

she said
that it was easy to think she could just leave
and I wouldn't care

to be honest
I thought I wouldn't
but she's still in this town
and still in here
this place

I think I'll live with strands of her hair
for as long as I've lived with her.

dm
3 Jan 2013
v.1

So, now, 

Everything I don't want to happen
Happens
See it come creeping up the hill
a Birnam diguise full of hewing and hate
that I unleash attempting to spare
myself her final sympathetic and caring farewell

and the deep combing throom 
of the door to her heart closing
is the sound that topples temples
and shakes the roots of parliaments of trees

the thickest brass struck with the most ancient wood
in a signal of final closing
that continual significant mistake tolled over and over

II.

the crushing push on your core
as you look for some small sign
that small smile when you pull her close
in the warm bedded early morning

now she just bends as far away as possible
clutching and cupping her phone, hiding her calls
hiding from you
pulling away one old sweet mannerism at a time
and you can't afford to lose
knowing how you allowed it to slip past you

III.

Chance and magic and the shear translucent weight
the funny way you don't see it
when it's put right in front of you

just before you realize you don't deserve any other outcome
and that's the way it really is