Aerodynamic

I was warned
As glasses condensated
on the dark table surface

But I unfurled
And let you pull me along

You face the air
Letting it pass around you
Never a touch

Slip through
Wind and smoke
Dissapating into nothing

Evidence

I think I told you once
About clouds and music
Floating lines and forms
and all the sounds they make

When I watch the sky
I remember those snippets
The paragraph conversations
That would pop up

and we would pass that between us
like a pipe or an offering
To appease those murmmers

The quiet things I never say
That always come out
In glances and movements
prove it

Speaking Distance

I.

Anna said she was getting married
Her hair was longer and the pudgyness was gone

That’s why no one
Went out with her before

Funny how I remembered her name
And recognized her in the dark

I said good bye knowing I’d never see her again
She probably doesn’t think about it

II.

I don’t want to live in my home town
Too many other people do

My life is weather for a dream

Bush throws a Press Conference!

Amazingly enough, Bushie has actually consented to un-fettered questioning by the White House press corps this morning. Don't know if anyone had a chance to catch it or not, but I think, after watching some of it, he's not quite as big an idiot as we might have thought. He's brilliant at straw man arguments; utilizing phrases like "they say", "some say" or "some in Washington say", all of which are code words for Democrats and liberals.

Make sure to read the transcript later today. I'm sure it will be good for loads of extremely nervous laughs...

cheers

So I just changed my comments defaults to allow anyone to post.

So, post away!

cheers,

mcd

for Jen...and Wil

When you made me breakfast

I was already awake and listening to you
As you walked down the hall and showered
And made coffee

Sitting on that porch
On that particular day
With the easy breeze and sunshine
Some comments about thoughtlessness
And how our dog's return our love

You on the steps and me
There by that old copy of Walden
On a Goodwill-college-apartment love seat

We sat and talked in front of an open window
(even though the heat was on)
Bitching about how he always knew it all
And that you couldn't tell him anything

Planning a beach trip for the dogs
When the night before you had
Only felt like crying

You broke my heart and when I left
I could feel each person's thoughts
As I drove by

Through alien streets
That felt so familiar

Late in the afternoon
When the light is perfect
And even when I hadn't said goodbye
I wanted to spend those hours with you

That's when it's easy to get lost in the urge
To rescue the dour heart
But you only need a Sunday paper
And enough daylight to dread tomorrow

It never ceases to amaze me how much rejection affects me. I never seem to be able to move past it quickly, regardless of the cause. Recently, I sent out some resumes to "test the market". After some intially positive responses, all were promptly rejected. There's that word again...My point is, even though I wasn't REALLY serious, I still feel, well, not worthless, just as if everyone else got a Christmas present and mine was sent to the wrong address. Ok, so there's a bit of self-pity there but I haven't been open enough about it and I think that's the problem.

Otherwise, it's been a fantastic last couple of weeks. But, with this recent rejection, I'm starting to get an ominous feeling that there's some big changes in store for me, which might not be "all good".

How do you handle your feelings of self-worth? I would think that, at some point, everyone feels this way, but the nature of it trends towards internalization so, coupled with the low self-esteem that comes with rejection, I tend to feel as if I'm the only person in the world who is dealing with these feelings; I realize I'm not, so, everyone give me some external validation! :)

As for the rest, I'd like to end on a positive note with yet another poem. I know, I know; it's a very high school thing to do, but I have to make sure that Bart gets some happy in his day, which will certainly make me happy. So, JB, this is for you. I wrote this for a class I took in college which was taught by Richard Murphy, who was once the poet laurete of Ireland:

Meeting the Poet

Old Irish Man looked up at me
His face scrunched up
Like whiskey smells

And said aloud
"Cotton floating down
On polar bears"

Shook his head
Shuffling my paper
To the bottom of the pile

Covered plate pot luck blues

I.

My life
Is a mish-mash of memories
Played out on tv trays

A myriad of casseroles
My plate dotted with
A little of everything

I am trapped
Behind a wall of lima beans
And boiled squash

II.

Sinkingdeeperintothebrowncouch
Thehypnotictrance
Ofconversationrises
Likeamantra
Fromthegrownuptable
Withthewaftsofcigarettesmokeand
Hangsthere

Low flat clouds
Over the sun

Have you seen this new Diet Coke commercial? It begins by showing a couple at the end of a first date. They say goodnight and exchange an extremely awkward kiss on the cheek, which was initiated by the guy. He then walks off, shaking his head at the situation, as if saying, "I'm such a dork!" Then he opens his Diet Coke and the magic happens; floating bubbles spew forth from his drink, imbuing him with a new found confidence. He then runs back to where he left his reluctant paramour, grabs her and forcefully kisses her before she can get in the waiting cab (apparantly she had already come to the conclusion that the evening was over). She then wraps her arms around Cassanova in helpless abandon. Seems that Diet Coke gives one, "bounce".

So, my point is this; what if the girl hadn't responded to the confident kiss in kind? The message appears to be that it's better to risk rejection, because if you show some gumption, it gives you a magic sort of appeal that makes you irresistable. My guess is that it's more of a 50-50 proposition and may NOT be worth the risk. Does the risky act make you spontaneous, rebellious and appealing or does it just make you a creep, or, even worse, a sex offender?

Check out a pal's site for some great photos...www.rockstargonesoft.blogspot.com

Way to go Bart! If it really is your world, I don't mind.

Now, if we can just get to the liquor store in time to put our floaties on...

This from Dan Froomkin's Wash Post column, White House Briefing:

"In early 1944, the New York Times asked Vice President Henry Wallace to, as Wallace noted, 'write a piece answering the following questions: What is a fascist? How many fascists have we? How dangerous are they?' Wallace's answer to those questions was published in the Times on April 9, 1944, at the height of the war against the Axis powers of Germany and Japan. See how much you think his statements apply to our society today:

'The really dangerous American fascist,' Wallace wrote, '. . . is the man who wants to do in the United States in an American way what Hitler did in Germany in a Prussian way. The American fascist would prefer not to use violence. His method is to poison the channels of public information. With a fascist the problem is never how best to present the truth to the public but how best to use the news to deceive the public into giving the fascist and his group more money or more power.'

"In his strongest indictment of the tide of fascism he saw rising in America, Wallace added, 'They claim to be super-patriots, but they would destroy every liberty guaranteed by the Constitution. They demand free enterprise, but are the spokesmen for monopoly and vested interest. Their final objective toward which all their deceit is directed is to capture political power so that, using the power of the state and the power of the market simultaneously, they may keep the common man in eternal subjection.' "

There is a conventional wisdom developing whereby many of us seem to yearn for a strong personality to point us in the right direction and tell us what to do. Democracy is painful and requires much of its adhereants. It certainly seems easier when we're given something to be afraid of and told who to blame for that fear, but I'm not so sure that idea leads ultimately to the best end.

What's the old saying, "The hard thing to do and the right thing to do are, more often than not, the same thing." Now, I would say it's much more difficult to accept the limitations of our governing system, imperfect as it is, because it's better than the alternative. Others would say that these unique times are forcing some real difficult choices upon us, especially when it comes to civil liberties.

What do you think?

So, I'm on my way up to drop all of the points I just spent yesterday rigging for the Tom Joyner radio show here at Memorial Auditorium.

While there yesterday, I noticed that the good folks from the show were placing US Army mugs and t-shirts in all of the seats in the auditorium (2000+). This morning, they are broadcasting live with an audience in attendance. Presumably, each person attending will recieve the mug, shirt and some sort of recruiting pitch.

Now, my question, gentile readers, is this: how do you feel about this situation? With all of the flack lately regarding the armed forces attempts to recruit on college and high school campus', how do you all feel about the utilization of a nationally syndicated show as an entry point for recruitment while also serving as a charitable event? And how should we as a people attempt to encourage young men and women to serve something outside of themselves without politicizing it?

Ok, I don't want to be overly political, but I do want to put a plug in for two columns I think are well worth reading: White House Briefing and Media Notes, both of which are availible at washingtonpost.com. You'll have to register to read, but there are certainly worse things to register for.

So, I just finished rigging the Tom Joyner radio show here at the local PAC and I can't decide if I want to go home or not. In the interest of taking up space, I'll take a small bit of inspiration (read: stealing the idea) from my pal Bart, who's email this morning led to the creation of Glorymercypeacetruth, and start with a poem:

Shark's Teeth

I sat in the ocean
as meat

Something hunted for food

Oiled and Innocent
Picking up the chipped black slivers
that fall from the mouths of killers

Cetain death
that lingers beneath the waves

cheers,

mcd